Wondering Why Is It So Hard To Remember Your Wife’s Birthday?

Raoul Eiseman
5 min readOct 9, 2020
Photo by Manasvita S on Unsplash

I lead a very simple life so it is 2 am and I am thinking about going to bed and I said Alexa, what is the date and she said it is October 8 and I said shit. No wonder she was making a cake today because it is her birthday and look at my watch in panic. The local supermarket is open 24/7 so I drive over and walk to the door and the big sign states this door is closed so I walk over to the other door and a guard says may I help you? I said aren’t you open and he said that because of the pandemic they close midnight to six and if I need food that 7/11 is open. I explain my horrible plight and he sympathizes with me and I say, let me buy one of these plants in the lot and I will pay you and much to my relief he approves, but said I need to go lock some doors so leave the money in the shopping cart by the door. So I pick a hanging plant with pretty flowers knowing we don’t have any hooks for it and I think I will hang it from a ceiling lamp or something and look in my wallet to find three fives for my $10.99 plant. I put it under a newspaper with the three fives showing in a nice pattern being careful not to touch the cart or the newspaper. Wait, I say to myself what if somebody walks up and takes the money or how do I know the guard won’t pocket the money and I decide no matter as I walk way over to the car parked at the other door and I laugh out loud to the world…

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